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[there is something about Ryuji's sad, defeated puppy expression that somehow strikes him like a tuning fork, to the point where Dave actually starts moving to go fetch some popcorn from the replicators. like, he's pretty much instinctually drawn to fixing that frown ASAP. make up for the popcorn colonel of the SS Haunted Reverie that managed to escape.]

[but he doesn't even have time to do that, or really even consider it, before —]

Billy .... Bonka.

[before Ryuji goes ahead and lobs a copyright infringement-free dodgeball at him. and Dave does not actually make a move to dodge. it just smacks him completely square in the face. he is out. there's no tagging him back in this round.]

[..............]

[no ... don't think about this too hard!! think about ascending to the ceiling, instead, where copyright laws can't follow. he pulls two jackets away from whatever's keeping them pinned to the ceiling, dropping them down without really giving them a second look, because the "whatever's keeping them pinned to the ceiling" is as much strange as it is an old and familiar friend, and that catches his attention instantly. but the jackets are blue. they're warm and comfortably sized. you know which ones they are.]

[also, Dave seems to have found a skateboard.]

Edited 2018-10-09 21:20 (UTC)

[if it makes Gundam feel any better about not remembering high school, Dave never even graduated junior high. he has no whacky teen movie memories to begin with!]

... Super High School Level Breeder. [what.]

[but, weirdly enough, he doesn't ... seem all that perturbed by such a wild sounding story? because —]

That's really fuckin' weird, but to be honest, that's the same exact shit that happened to us. Except it was more of a "chill on a lab on a meteor in the middle of space for three years" setup, not an island.

Even got goofy titles like that one, too. Mine's Knight of Time.

which part of that do you figure im pullin your leg on

[Did he stutter?

He doesn't think he did. Billy Bonka and the Chocolate Factory, right? That's what he was talking about here. How could Dave never have seen such a timeless classic?

And he doesn't know why Dave starts to go in the opposite direction at first, either, but boy... would he be entirely too stoked about wanting to get him popcorn just because some ghost felt the urge to deny him of the simple pleasures in life. That's cute, dude. But it comes and goes without further question, because that motion must've been a wind up to the pitch of Dave just floating right on up to the ceiling.

Ryuji still thinks it's kind of cool, even though his arms are crossed and he's trying to play it off like it's just normal, everyday stuff.]

What's up th--- ARR--- [Immediately, as the jackets begin to drop down to the floor, he tries to catch them both. One lands squarely on his face, and the other in his arms like he's just caught Ra......pun...zel... leaping out of her high tower.

Goddamnit.

[He's struggling to not let one of them hit he floor while not getting his head stuck into a sleeve, and, God, Ryuji- there's a chair right there, it's not like you have to work very hard to make that happen.]

H3Y!
HOW 4R3 YOU HOLD1NG UP? >:O

That is the Supreme Overlord of Ice to you.

[Wait.]

Knight of Time?

[Is it possible? Gundam never questioned Dave's immortality but he never believed for a moment that he was truly the deigned deity of Hamster Valhalla!]

So you have finally revealed unto me your true name!

[Gundam looks incredibly pleased at this development.]

[okay, they're going to have a long and hopefully productive conversation about everything wrong with Billy Bonka in a few minutes. assuming Dave doesn't get distracted.]

[but he certainly could answer that question, as he floats back down, skateboard that seems to have that same glitchy texture as the sord..... and that one pair of shades in tow. he could even, once he's back in range, help Ryuji out with his clothing malfunction there.]

[you know what else Dave could do? he could sit back and watch for a few, to see if Ryuji manages to literally thumb wrestle his way out of a pair of letter jackets.]

[... hm.]

[decisions....]

Dude, hold still. [he reaches forward and plucks the errant coat off of his head. there you go, Ryugenie, you're free.]

hey
im pretty fucking great actually
really into the new ambiance thing going on right now
all that bonus static and screaming add the extra horror spice ive been missing out on you know
just shovel more of that shit on my plate like im at a goddamn dismay buffet

what about you

[Dave doesn't even know what a senpai is, mysteriously vanishing bracket text!!!]

What? Oh, yeah, I guess that's it. I've got my preferences, too, though, Supreme Ovelord of Ice Pop.

[forgive him, Gundam, he doesn't even realize he made a slight enhancement to the title. it just slipped out.]

Just Dave is fine. Or, nah, go with immortal god of hamster Valhalla, that one's pretty cool.

1'V3 B33N DO1NG 4LR1GHT!
HON3STLY B3TT3R TH4N 1 H4V3 B33N FOR 4 WH1L3
BUT UH
1T SOUNDS L1K3 ST4T1C TO YOU?
WOW 1 THOUGHT TH4T P3RSON W4S OV3R3X4GG3R4T1NG 4ND JUST THROW1NG 4 T4NTRUM 4BOUT TH3 MUS1C
BUT 1F YOU'R3 T4LK1NG 4BOUT 1T TOO TH3N 1 GU3SS 1T'S TRU3

Mostly that last part. If it's an alternate universe, you shouldn't be able to run into any other "version" of yourself.

what do you mean by that

wait what
are you saying you can still hear the music
youre not hearing someones shitty haunted house mix tape when you leave your room
how did you manage that

[the answer to that may or may not ... be obvious? Dave may or may not also be a moron sometimes.]

[Coming back up for air feels amazing. There are bright lights in the room again, and he's not stumbling over himself to try and treat these ghostly garments with the respect they deserve. Are they unidentifiable? Maybe a good wash in the laundromat would reveal their true armor bonuses.

And once the entire spectacle dies down, he looks at the skateboard. It's hard to make heads or tails of it, like he's looking into a piece of purely fabricated bullshit, and he's seen two artifacts that had the same qualities. And has nil patience for any of its bullshit by this point.]

... Dude... is this forreal...

[But he's also somewhat amused by the fact that Dave can hold onto it. It's like these things come with levels of fried- gently to a golden brown or blackened and willing to crumple away, begging for its own non-existence to be brought back to it. Like the shades, he's guessing this is more the former than the latter. Better to pay attention to something actually real, like the varsity jacket in his arms.]

Whatcha think this stands for?

Y3S!
1 N3V3R STOPP3D H34R1NG 1T

DO YOU TH1NK 1T M1GHT B3 B3C4US3 1 TOOK H3R OFF3R?
D1D YOU R3FUS3 1T?

Completely for real.

[as if to prove his point (??) Dave releases his grip on the skateboard. and as if the logistics of Unreal Air itself wasn't already a point of contention, despite the fact that it's true that the both of them are very familiar with this particular brand of bullshit, it just ... starts floating to the ceiling again. nary a care in the world.]

[It is RIDICULOUS what kind of air this thing is getting. Dude come get the ruler check this out.]

[anyway, with that subject back on the ceiling, he turns the jacket he grabbed over in his hands to get a better look at it.]

No idea, though. You're the sportsball guy in this relationship, I figure you've got a better shot of guessing right than I do.

you did
did you turn into cloud of butterflies too

youre right though
i turned down her offer
a lot of the shit she made sounded like
REALLY fucking good on paper
or in my brain i guess
but i dunno i couldnt shake something the cloud of butterflies i did talk to said

NOP3!
1T'S 4LW4YS B33N R34LLY H4RD FOR M3 TO T4LK 4BOUT MY PROBL3MS 4ND HOW 1 F33L
1'V3 TR13D TO K33P 1T QU13T BUT 1T'S SOM3TH1NG TH4T'S B33N SCR3W1NG M3 UP FOR 4 R34LLY LONG T1M3!
SO SH3 G4V3 M3 4 W4Y TO M4K3 1T 34S13R FOR M3

>:O
4ND WH4T D1D TH3 3R1K4 CLOUD OF BUTT3RFL13S S4Y?

[He's so fucking tilt over this. Ryuji doesn't exactly know why he's tilting, but he sure is, and it's written right on his expression of incredulity as the goddamn thing just happily joins the ceiling like the floor was literally made out of lava.]

Did you. Did you really just.

[With a free hand, he covers his face, index finger reaching just between his eyebrows as his palm eclipses his nose and mouth.]

You just let that thing go back up there after all that work you did grabbing it and getting its bullshit ass back down here.

[Yeah, that's probably the point of contention he has over the entire thing, to be honest.]

Uh... [Oh?

Oh.

Oh.]

Thumb wrestling... championship.

Well, yeah, there's a reason it's called Unreal Air.

[and for all the tilt Ryuji may be feeling over it, the usual subtle signs are all pointing to Dave being equally pretty goddamn pleased with himself. the way he sort of half rolls his shoulders in a casual shrug. the light smirk that sticks around a few seconds longer than usual.]

[because there are a lot of things that he likes about Ryuji — and pissing him off via Homestuck mechanics happens to be somewhere toward the top of that list.]

[— wait what.]

Thumb wrestling championship. [.................]

So ... what, the ghosts are building us up for the pay-per-view rematch?

[don't get Dave wrong, he's still going to wear the shit out of it — in fact, he's already pulling on the one he was holding. it's warm. it's a callback to how a moment that started off pretty shitty turned out pretty fucking great, all things considered.]

[it's ironic.]

youd think
but thats not really how timelines work
or i guess i should say thats not how time travel itself works
and fuckin unfortunately thats my area of expertise

i mean
i dont really mind talking about it if youre curious
just dont know how relevant it is here

[BOY, THAT'S. that's...]

pretty much exactly that
with a side of how being butterflies means your secrets stop mattering
and how it means you turn into all your selves at once
including the ones youre trying to hide or cant be or some shit like that
which i guess makes sense from some non splintery standpoint
i think thats what dirk called em
but im not really all that keen on knowing what random discount doomed dave two fucking thousand has been getting up to
im not even sure i want to know what the john fixed the timeline dave is doing

[this is just like old times, honestly. Dave having an axe to grind, despite sometimes giving off the air of being too cool for this, and just dumping his lengthy complaints on Terezi whether she wants to hear them or not. he may as well be face down on the floor, fresh off an acrobatic pirouette off the handle.]

wait hang on
if you didnt turn into butterflies then what happened

[There's something terrible about Ryuji being the most educated of the three of them.]

Preferences? [San-D climbs down Dave's arm to sit in his hand. If he wants to be the immortal god of hamster Valhalla, that's fine with her. She wants to be showered in affection in retribution for her acknowledgement.]

I can not say I am satisfied with such an explanation. Why do you shirk the class of knighthood?

[Gundam brushes a bit glue onto some cardboard, so Maga-Z and Cham-P can push two tubes of chuu-nnel together.]

1 DON'T KNOW WH4T K1ND OF PROBL3MS SOM3ON3 WOULD H4V3 TO TURN 1NTO 4N 1NF1N1T3 1NS3CT FR4CT4L SW4RM
BUT 1T S33MS TO B3 WORK1NG FOR H3R JUST F1N3
WH4T H4PP3N3D TO H3R W4S 4BOUT H3R! 4ND WH4T WOULD H4V3 H4PP3N3D TO YOU WOULD H4V3 B33N 4BOUT YOU
4ND WH4T *YOU* W4NT3D
NOT H3R OR 4NYON3 3LS3 OR 4NY OF YOUR F1V3 M1LL1ON P3RMUT4T1ONS
UNL3SS TH4T'S WH4T YOU W4NT3D

SOM3T1M3S P3OPL3 N33D H3LP B31NG OK4Y W1TH TH3MS3LV3S
TO H34L 4ND MOV3 ON 4ND B3COM3 TH3 YOU TH4T M4K3S YOU H4PP13ST

4ND SOM3T1M3S P3OPL3 4R3N'T R34DY TO B3 OK4Y W1TH TH4T H4PP1N3SS

4NYW4Y
HM
1 DON'T KNOW HOW 4LS3 TO PUT 1T, D4V3
BUT 1'V3 GOT 4 LOT OF MOUTHS NOW.

Yeah. Probably. I don't think they know how badly the ratings cherry bombed last time.

[Casually said, of course. Ryuji watches Dave pull on the jacket, almost expecting it to blow up or immediately rip in true ghost knockoff fashion. But when nothing happens, it strikes him that the second one... is probably meant for him? Like, it was all too contextual to the both of them for it not to be.

Oh.

Cool?

Cool. He'll put his own on. This is pretty sick. Comfortable as hell, too.]

Swag. [Ryuji doesn't think it's ironic at all, for the record.]

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