inbox for balance_rpg

[oculusriffs]

TG: this is going to be fucking stupid isnt it


[want to get in touch with Dave? you can leave a TEXT, VOICE, or VIDEO message — or alternatively, he shouldn't be too hard to track down in person.]

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[ryuji]

[Considering his day consisted of getting alcohol bottles thrown at him, finding a crutch in the forest to use as a weapon, had his pirate ship crash into said forest, had to dig up an empty grave, and then couldn't even get ramen right? Yeah. Tired's a pretty good word for it. It's only exacerbated by the sleepy guy that's currently making himself a pillow out of Ryuji, and even if he had wanted to leave (spoiler: he didn't), he's not sure he'd be able to get out of the grasp to begin with (spoiler the second: he doesn't want to). Part of him wants to ask if his flatmate would mind him staying over, but then again, he's pretty sure that personally speaking? Personally, strictly from a person who's about ten minutes from falling asleep himself, he figures it'll work out alright.

...Provided they don't get woken up by a en edgelord looking to create a palace of cardboard for his hamnagerie.

Ryuji tries to wiggle his uninjured hand back to freedom, so that he can do two things: get them in a horizontal position where they can resume octopus'ing the hell out of each other, and make it smooth enough that it doesn't cause a ton of disturbance to this otherwise nice kind of thing they have going. So he'll do that; he'll do the thing, and try not to stab his boyfriend with his collarbone in the process.]

Yeah. [He didn't really need to confirm anything here, but he figures Dave wouldn't mind hearing it. He tries dragging Dave's pillow under his head, and notices almost immediately that it doesn't smell like him yet. One of the downsides of starting over, he guesses.]

Got a feeling... you're gonna be in my dreams again tonight.

[It's not a big revelation, but many of them had Dave in them as it was. And when they're situated with him still up against his shoulder, he shifts a bit so that for a while, until he's too tired to do so, he can idly rake his fingers through his hair. It might not be an immediate sleep, he still has a few things on his mind and it's impossible to calm down completely until those competing things stop vying for his attention, but for the time being, he can lay there and just feel how nice it is to have the weight of someone else on him.]

[oculusriffs]

[death by collarbone wouldn't be the worst way to go; Dave's always been pretty into Ryuji's shoulders — that's why he's chosen to go chilling in the general area right now.]

[speaking of right now, there's a lot happening that, even by themselves, would probably be plenty enough to reduce Dave to a sleepy stupor. the fact that he's there for him to rest on to begin with. the idle combing of his hair. the light and steady rhythm of breathing. judging by the sudden quiet, that was pretty much a triple critical hit to his HP bar of consciousness.]

[right up until he does that thing where you jolt awake after dozing off sudden and hard, then catch a mild second wind. Dave reaches up and pulls off his shades, because he's apparently a dummy who just keeps accidentally falling asleep in them. it's a goofy habit that's persisted since the days of taking a gentle ball of yarn to the cranium.]

Again, huh? What other stuff you dream about? [that seems like a weird question on the surface. but then, the concept of dreaming normally is kind of weird to Dave — something he took six months to get used to. and as he asks, he draws his arm back around Ryuji, shades held casually between his fingers.]

[ryuji]

[He almost feels bad about waking Dave up just as he was about to dive over the cliff of consciousness, but it's this sort of stuff he loves just having between the two of them. Talks about nothing, talks about everything. Quiet, honest, simple moments between the two of them, and he's greedy enough to try and placate it with continuing to scratch softly at the back of his head.

Yeah, he's a bit of a dummy, but that's his dummy, who up until pretty recently had a sylladex to stash his shades in when he needed to protect them as he slept. Ryuji can't see his eyes from this angle, not with the way he's lazily smiling into his hair, but he's always adored their tint whenever he sees them.

And, in the attempt to not be a horrible boyfriend and accidentally crush those shades that his best bro had given him, Ryuji will stop for a moment and try to reach out to them and get them over on the nightstand instead. Barring any resistance from Dave, of course- otherwise he won't push and just add a layer of really dumb bullshit to the world of regular people dreaming to the mix.]

Have this recurring one where I'm inside a me-sized hamster ball and Goodbye Kitty is chasin' me around Tokyo, but he's, like... I dunno, 15 feet tall and breathes out these massive lookin' tunas like fire breath.

[Yeah, that's dumb. But the other dreams he has all run the gamut from boring to kind of really shitty. He doesn't know if he's slept with Dave during the ones where he relives his leg getting broken, but it does come up every now and again. Dreams being dreams, though, there's always something off about the entire thing. Like instead of being at school, it'll happen in a shopping mall. Or on the subway and no one cares as it happens. That sort of stuff.]

[oculusriffs]

[there's no resistance; Ryuji is free to set the shades somewhere much safer than a sleeping Dave's face, or idly hanging in a half asleep Dave's hand — and that probably speaks a lot to the amount of trust at play here. those sunglasses are one of his most valuable possessions. they're the only thing he has left to remember a best friend he probably won't ever see again.]

[he's not really thinking about that though. pretty much every single alert brain cell is currently devoted to trying to imagine Ryuji roll around Tokyo like some sort of Dark Deva of Destruction, while some sort of giant angry Tuna Lisa is in hot pursuit. he might not be able to see Dave's eyes, but maybe Ryuji can spot the way his brows furrow in concentration over this apparently very important mental image.]

Y'know, I don't normally knock people for weird dream shit, but ... that's really fuckin' weird, dude.

[that piece said, he shifts a little, rolling his shoulder. Ryuji's liable to put him right back to sleep the longer he continues with the light head scratch.]

I had dreams like that up until I was 13. Then it was dream selves and dream bubbles and dumb shit like that for three years ... it kinda took a while to adjust to dreaming normally again.

— As normal as dreams about bein' a giant hamster can get, anyway.

fuckin tuna lisa.

[ryuji]

Hey...

[He's entirely offended by the "fuckin' weird" part of that, but he's also a really bad actor and can't keep a straight face to save his life. Not to mention the way his chest vibrates upward as he tries to eat down a laugh that's getting caught at the back of his throat. Kind of hard to miss that when he's practically giving Dave an earthquake from it.

Ryuji also regrets that a little bit, seeing as how Dave looks pretty comfy over there, and it's not like he actively wants to keep him awake just after coming out and saying that he was tired. They've had a good number of conversations about the absolute shit-tier crap that Dave went through after his life got all video gamed and quest gated and god gated, a whole lot of gates and hoops to jump through, but he's racking his head at trying to remember anything about being dream gated. Bubbles, other selves...]

Dream bubbles? Dude, you lost me.

[And, as if his concentration had to be split between touching Dave's head or talking to him, his hand stops moving. He's kind of curious about what he's dreamed about ever since then, too. He'll just throw the second question out anyway and let him take whichever one, or both, that he wants to pick up.]

I just told you a deep ass part about my soul, so you're gonna have to fess up next.

its my best work yet

[oculusriffs]

[lol. it’s so easy to dunk on him, but judging by that failure to stifle a laugh that Dave felt more than he heard, he can venture a guess that Ryuji isn’t actually all that tilted over it. but a tilt is a tilt, and he’s keen on quelling it, so he moves his arm that had been lazily draped, snaking it around Ryuji in a tighter embrace.]

[it’s not like he has room to judge on weird dreams. if the initiation test is any indicator, if the way his contribution to the landscape was a really dumb giant skateboard, then his own subconscious also apparently favors the oversized recreational gear. ... which just makes him wonder if they actually make human sized hamster exercise balls for people to roll around in.]

[..... hm.]

[anyway, he’s also only capable of focusing on one thing at a time, though, so he goes for the question that’s easiest to answer.]

Yeah, dream bubbles are just these literal bubbles floating out in space. You can use one to visit other people’s dream bubbles while you’re sleeping.

Mostly, though, they’re just like. A dead Sburb player repository. Or an afterlife, if you want a less stupid way of putting it. Most of the ones we passed through were full of ghosts.

[ryuji]

[Sounds about right on the money for what he could expect coming from Dave- both the squeezing and the explanation, actually. And that's a weird thought. Falling asleep and going off to explore other people's dream states? Like a neural network of thoughts for the dead and the living. Weird, a little dark, but also relatively sad.]

Dead players, huh... Sorry, man. That musta been rough.

[It makes him somewhat uncomfortable to think about, though. The idea of something happening to Dave has crossed his mind so many times since being on the station and having to deal with a constant, real threat that the next thing that happened to them could have been the last... the idea of of this not happening right now- Dave being nuzzled up in his arms- it's pretty unacceptable.]

Just... fallin' asleep and bein' able to talk to people you'd never see otherwise. I guess it's better that you're dealin' with regular weird dreams instead, or somethin'.

[His hand eventually lowers so that it's just resting against his back, keeping him nice and secure against him.]

Gotta wonder, though, if that's really how it goes down. Everyone believes in different shit about the afterlife. Us Japanese people... it's either Shinto or Buddhist. You die and your spirit goes down into some sorta underground cave and gets recycled into all the other spirits, or you get stuck being born again to get a second round to do it better than the last. Eh, I don't really put a lotta stock in either.

But shit, if I was reborn and that was actually how it happens, all I know is that I hope I'd get to see you again.

[Ryuji...]

[oculusriffs]

Kinda. But, most of the ghosts we saw were a bunch of trolls I've never met before — and if it helps, not a lot of them seemed to give a shit about being dead.

[the second wind is starting to wear off, and Ryuji keeping him both steady and nice and warm is only hastening it, like a dust devil lazily unswirling itself, settling down to rest. whatever anxieties he had about this new base or this new quest earlier don't matter a single lick right now. all that matters is that he's on the very strong side of relaxed, and that's all thanks to the way he's being held by his boyfriend right now.]

Personally, though? Most religions sound like bullshit to me. Doesn't discount the idea there's a place everybody, not just Sburb players, goes to after you die, though. I mean ... leap frogging across entire universes is already a completely provable thing, despite basically nothing about it bein' logical. Who's to say that even an afterlife itself can't be some extension of that?

[...........]

I dunno. That probably doesn't make much sense. I do know, though, that you just said some really sappy shit back there, and now I've gotta do something about it.

[Dave can't really reach Ryuji's mouth from this vantage point, though, so he just goes for a kiss against his jawline instead. it's the perfect punishment. but it's also a reflection of the sentiment — the idea that leaping through realities just to see each other again is both a desire and achievable.]

[ryuji]

[He keeps talking about the afterlife, and Ryuji can't tell if it's just a normal couple thing to do, to share those kind of thoughts and have conversations around the possibilities of things, or whether it's just a them specific kind of deal.

The thought that's swirling up in Ryuji's mind is just continually sappy, though, and he's being punished for it. Wherever the door at the end of this entire journey leads, he wants to be the one holding the hand out this time. Go and make a place where they can be- whether it's Tokyo, or Houston, or some magical place where people wear JRPG costumes every day. Doesn't really matter, as long as he's there.

But he doesn't really get the chance to say that when he's being so deeply assaulted with jaw kisses. And Ryuji's pretty weak to those too.]

Ahh... oh noooo... what am I gonna do....

[That's the weakest resistance ever and softly sarcastic. But the way he holds Dave is in place might give a better idea of some of that silly, worried sentimentality. With a wide smile against the top of Dave's head, he takes in the way his hair smells- huh, is that apple?- and settles in for the night in the best way he could think possible; with Dave.]