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[ah, being introduced to the family ... Dave is pretty sure he knows exactly how Ryuji meeting Rose would go.]

i mean ive seen her before
she was just asleep

[which reminds him, he's never really told Ryuji his origin story, has he? boy, that's. that's going to be a weird conversation. and he can only hope he wouldn't screw up meeting Ryuji's mom like he screwed up meeting John's mom — you know, he pretty much immediately called her a hot mom.]

is that your gut feeling then
taking her offer
does that sound like whats supposed to happen
like is it the correct version of events
not tryin to make that decision for you
thats yours to make you know
whether you want my opinion or not and im pretty happy that you want it to begin with to be honest
but if i were gonna put my own guts into words
id say its not that i dont think doing what feels right here is a bad move
im just worried
what if it starts off right then veers off into wholly fucking wrong territory
what if something nobody was expecting happens
what if whatever goes completely tilted cant be undone

thats all though
you know how i feel about you dude
just maybe think about it some more before you accept

[Please don't call Mrs. Sakamoto a hot mom, dude. At least not in front of Ryuji. Or to her face. Or at all, really???]

Dude, I dunno. I don't have those time instincts like you do. For me, it's just like. Feeling something's right, just at the moment before jumpin' into the water, and it kinda feels like that right now.

But there ain't no way to know if this does end up in the wholly fucking wrong territory kinda way.

Yeah, thanks. I'm gonna think about it some more.

[A few moments pass before this one comes blaring up Dave's communicator.]

Hey, dumb question but I still wanna hear the answer to it. If I did grow like, 2 extra legs or something, you'd still wanna be with me, right?

Edited 2018-10-05 23:10 (UTC)

you mean regular human legs
or are we talking something like horse legs

[Ryuji ... Centaurmoto]

nah youre fine bro

I dunno, depends on how bad I wanna hoof it I guess

Either way, aight. I'll stop horsin around and get my noggin a goin'

unless youre actually destined to become a horse
then again
if you did then wouldnt that mean that everything you do automatically qualifies as horsin around

anyway are you busy
could use your help on something

Neigh, dude, it insists it

Yeah sure what's up

[oh my god ... this isn't a watch call, but maybe Ryuji can still hear him groaning at all the awful horse puns from wherever Dave is on the station.]

im in the mess hall

[and that's the only intel he's offering, apparently.]

[It's definitely instinctual, the way he knows those puns are so deeply loved by everyone around him, completely oblivious to the fact that everyone pretty much can't... stand them. And with a cheeky grin, he looks down at his watch and fires back a casual reply.]

Be there, uh, as quick as the elevators can take me.

[On his way out, he grabs his school bag, both straps of the somewhat worn satchel placed over his shoulders, despite the fact that this definitely isn't a Jansport at all. He's got some contraband to share that he's forgot about up until Dave said mess hall.

And about five minutes later, give or take a few extra seconds for the elevator jazz music to die down a bit, he's poking his head into the cafeteria. Dave, as ever, is easy as shit to spot, and he waves as he approaches. If he's sitting, Ryuji will pull up a chair and plop his ass down.]

Edited 2018-10-08 02:16 (UTC)

[Ryuji's pretty great at standing out in a crowd himself? usual access to hair bleach or not. but nah, he's not sitting, he's just standing next to a table, a plate of the usual toast set there, as he'd apparently planned to sit himself down to eat. he lifts a hand to wave back.]

Hey.

[but then, before he could enjoy a helping of space toast, something suddenly came up. literally. his open palm closes, save for one finger pointing straight up.]

[because there appears to be clothing stuck to the ceiling.]

H...ey. [His eyes follow Dave's upward pointing gesture, not sure what he's just signed himself up for. And when he sees what's dangling up there, he's not sure he's ready to believe this hardboiled bullshit that's going on.]

Seriously? Is this forreal?

[It hits him that they're probably being actively haunted again. Which is dumb as balls, because it's been at least a week since Ryuji flushed anything completely egregious down the toilet. A WEEK.]

Oh hell no. Not this goddamn bullshit again.

[Again.]

When Hajime was havin' a movie night, I tossed a piece of popcorn up in the air to catch it in my mouth and it just started floatin' up in the air like the shit was possessed.

[He wanted to eat it so badly! Ryuji chased it around until Hajime caught his attention and he lost focus of it. Still had no idea that the only reason it was going down like that was because of Jedi magic tricks.]

[it's no wonder the ghosts are out to get them, considering all the crimes against toilets they commit, probably to the detriment of both the station itself and the other poor bastards on board the thing with them.]

Huh. Did you ever catch it?

[he needs the denouement here, Ryuji, help a bro out. did the popcorn live to float on and become a stale kernel lodged in the ceiling or what?]

[... wait, hang on. focus, Dave.]

I'm gonna go fetch whatever that is. I mostly just wanted a witness.

No...

[He looks so dejected when he says it, like he had just come up second in a race he really wanted to win. Sure, he had an entire bowl of popcorn with equally delicious treats to devour wholly, but none of them were as tantalizing as his white whale. He'll never know, either, that it wasn't the ghosts doing it. Unless Hajime told him.]

It was the one that got away.

[Speaking of getting away, this doesn't really have anything to do with the clothing just hanging from the ceiling. He should probably do the floating thing and take it down. He'll be Dave's cheer boy from the sidelines. Witness.

It's definitely more amusing than mulling over the pros and cons of accepting a contract with an unknown devilish entity.]

Anyway. I'll spot check you, dude. Like lighting weights, you gotta have a guy to make sure you don't end up like that scene in Billy Bonka where the kid starts flyin' up to the ceiling fan and has to burp to get down.

[there is something about Ryuji's sad, defeated puppy expression that somehow strikes him like a tuning fork, to the point where Dave actually starts moving to go fetch some popcorn from the replicators. like, he's pretty much instinctually drawn to fixing that frown ASAP. make up for the popcorn colonel of the SS Haunted Reverie that managed to escape.]

[but he doesn't even have time to do that, or really even consider it, before —]

Billy .... Bonka.

[before Ryuji goes ahead and lobs a copyright infringement-free dodgeball at him. and Dave does not actually make a move to dodge. it just smacks him completely square in the face. he is out. there's no tagging him back in this round.]

[..............]

[no ... don't think about this too hard!! think about ascending to the ceiling, instead, where copyright laws can't follow. he pulls two jackets away from whatever's keeping them pinned to the ceiling, dropping them down without really giving them a second look, because the "whatever's keeping them pinned to the ceiling" is as much strange as it is an old and familiar friend, and that catches his attention instantly. but the jackets are blue. they're warm and comfortably sized. you know which ones they are.]

[also, Dave seems to have found a skateboard.]

Edited 2018-10-09 21:20 (UTC)

[Did he stutter?

He doesn't think he did. Billy Bonka and the Chocolate Factory, right? That's what he was talking about here. How could Dave never have seen such a timeless classic?

And he doesn't know why Dave starts to go in the opposite direction at first, either, but boy... would he be entirely too stoked about wanting to get him popcorn just because some ghost felt the urge to deny him of the simple pleasures in life. That's cute, dude. But it comes and goes without further question, because that motion must've been a wind up to the pitch of Dave just floating right on up to the ceiling.

Ryuji still thinks it's kind of cool, even though his arms are crossed and he's trying to play it off like it's just normal, everyday stuff.]

What's up th--- ARR--- [Immediately, as the jackets begin to drop down to the floor, he tries to catch them both. One lands squarely on his face, and the other in his arms like he's just caught Ra......pun...zel... leaping out of her high tower.

Goddamnit.

[He's struggling to not let one of them hit he floor while not getting his head stuck into a sleeve, and, God, Ryuji- there's a chair right there, it's not like you have to work very hard to make that happen.]

[okay, they're going to have a long and hopefully productive conversation about everything wrong with Billy Bonka in a few minutes. assuming Dave doesn't get distracted.]

[but he certainly could answer that question, as he floats back down, skateboard that seems to have that same glitchy texture as the sord..... and that one pair of shades in tow. he could even, once he's back in range, help Ryuji out with his clothing malfunction there.]

[you know what else Dave could do? he could sit back and watch for a few, to see if Ryuji manages to literally thumb wrestle his way out of a pair of letter jackets.]

[... hm.]

[decisions....]

Dude, hold still. [he reaches forward and plucks the errant coat off of his head. there you go, Ryugenie, you're free.]

[Coming back up for air feels amazing. There are bright lights in the room again, and he's not stumbling over himself to try and treat these ghostly garments with the respect they deserve. Are they unidentifiable? Maybe a good wash in the laundromat would reveal their true armor bonuses.

And once the entire spectacle dies down, he looks at the skateboard. It's hard to make heads or tails of it, like he's looking into a piece of purely fabricated bullshit, and he's seen two artifacts that had the same qualities. And has nil patience for any of its bullshit by this point.]

... Dude... is this forreal...

[But he's also somewhat amused by the fact that Dave can hold onto it. It's like these things come with levels of fried- gently to a golden brown or blackened and willing to crumple away, begging for its own non-existence to be brought back to it. Like the shades, he's guessing this is more the former than the latter. Better to pay attention to something actually real, like the varsity jacket in his arms.]

Whatcha think this stands for?

Completely for real.

[as if to prove his point (??) Dave releases his grip on the skateboard. and as if the logistics of Unreal Air itself wasn't already a point of contention, despite the fact that it's true that the both of them are very familiar with this particular brand of bullshit, it just ... starts floating to the ceiling again. nary a care in the world.]

[It is RIDICULOUS what kind of air this thing is getting. Dude come get the ruler check this out.]

[anyway, with that subject back on the ceiling, he turns the jacket he grabbed over in his hands to get a better look at it.]

No idea, though. You're the sportsball guy in this relationship, I figure you've got a better shot of guessing right than I do.

[He's so fucking tilt over this. Ryuji doesn't exactly know why he's tilting, but he sure is, and it's written right on his expression of incredulity as the goddamn thing just happily joins the ceiling like the floor was literally made out of lava.]

Did you. Did you really just.

[With a free hand, he covers his face, index finger reaching just between his eyebrows as his palm eclipses his nose and mouth.]

You just let that thing go back up there after all that work you did grabbing it and getting its bullshit ass back down here.

[Yeah, that's probably the point of contention he has over the entire thing, to be honest.]

Uh... [Oh?

Oh.

Oh.]

Thumb wrestling... championship.

Well, yeah, there's a reason it's called Unreal Air.

[and for all the tilt Ryuji may be feeling over it, the usual subtle signs are all pointing to Dave being equally pretty goddamn pleased with himself. the way he sort of half rolls his shoulders in a casual shrug. the light smirk that sticks around a few seconds longer than usual.]

[because there are a lot of things that he likes about Ryuji — and pissing him off via Homestuck mechanics happens to be somewhere toward the top of that list.]

[— wait what.]

Thumb wrestling championship. [.................]

So ... what, the ghosts are building us up for the pay-per-view rematch?

[don't get Dave wrong, he's still going to wear the shit out of it — in fact, he's already pulling on the one he was holding. it's warm. it's a callback to how a moment that started off pretty shitty turned out pretty fucking great, all things considered.]

[it's ironic.]

Yeah. Probably. I don't think they know how badly the ratings cherry bombed last time.

[Casually said, of course. Ryuji watches Dave pull on the jacket, almost expecting it to blow up or immediately rip in true ghost knockoff fashion. But when nothing happens, it strikes him that the second one... is probably meant for him? Like, it was all too contextual to the both of them for it not to be.

Oh.

Cool?

Cool. He'll put his own on. This is pretty sick. Comfortable as hell, too.]

Swag. [Ryuji doesn't think it's ironic at all, for the record.]

Did they? I thought the ending was pretty good.

[Ryuji was obviously the first person he thought to ask to bear witness to some clothes stuck to the ceiling, so maybe it isn't as much of a coincidence as it feels that he's here to claim a jacket that seems to be completely intended for him.]

[Dave digs around for a few seconds and finds a smile. it's small, but pretty blatant, because aside from being possibly tricked into winning another thumb wrestling match, for once, it doesn't feel like this is an underhanded ghost gift. it isn't an apple that had a flavor of temptation to it, nearly sending him veering off somewhere really stupid on the timeline. it isn't a comic taped to the wall.]

[far as he can figure, it's just ... something nice that he can share with his boyfriend. no strings, aside from the ones stitching fabric together, attached.]

I guess I don't mind winning again, if it's a rematch they really wanna see.

[He absolutely has the ability to feel his own sleeve and not bother Dave with wanting to touch it, but then again, it comes with the added bonus of being physically intimate, so Ryuji approaches, and tests out the fabric on him. Lets his fingers trail down the side to pick up how well put together these actually are.

And as if he knew he was spending way too much time on that, he lifts his head upward and meets Dave at eye level. A really stupidly complacent look dances dopishly around his features until he smiles. He's excited, and it's hard to contain himself sometimes.]

God, not only are you the world's biggest cheater, but also, like, the world's biggest brag. [Also two traits he could wear just as well as these jackets.]

But, shit. We're this station's top power couple. [Don't ever say that??? again???] Matching outfits 'n everything.

[It's unbearable how wide his smile is right now.]

Power couple?

[you'd think he'd groan over that, but ... nah. he's still saving any noises of disapproval for Billy Bonka's existence — which he has not forgotten about, and will absolutely be bringing it back up at a time that's in equal measures inconvenient and inappropriate.]

[no, honestly, he doesn't really disagree with Ryuji here. the two of them, put together, have managed to evolve into some really bizarre force of nature, a spark plug and a kid who likes rapping way too much that somehow managed to convince murderous ghosts to throw them a relevant bone by being terrible at thumb wrestling.]

[so he doesn't really think Ryuji is wrong. that's why he lifts a hand to catch Ryuji's as it trails down his arm.]

Eh, it's fine. I don't mind being all those nouns if it means I get to match with you.

[WOW. a patented Dave Strider statement, in that it's jammed with multiple meanings, but this one comes with a bonus of being sappy as shit. he bites his lip, instinctively wanting to toss a joke in there, too, but ... but.]

[he just leaves it. because it's true.]

[Smooth, Dave Strider.

Really. Really. Fucking smooth.

It forces Ryuji's cheeks to tinge a different color, and goddamnit if those words don't get to him with the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. Funny how a few months ago, someone copping his style would've sent him full tilt, and now an earnest comment like that gets the dokis raring up to go like a Harley.

And in a way, it sort of makes up his mind, right here. About this whole Devil bullshit. Sure, someone with a silk tongue could probably swindle Ryuji out of everything he ever saved up, both in the realm of dollars and sense here, but even with everything that she had promised him, up to and including enough strength to protect the people he can't live without... just.

Fuck it.

He can do it on his own. He can handle it just fine as it is. It's probably one of those stupid teenager moments, when one person thinks they're actually Superman because they've got a heart to protect, but Ryuji is right there in it. Invincible, in a way, because he's got a matching jacket for armor and, well, Dave. It's more than just a good vibe. It's everything to him right now.

Ryuji watches him bite his lip and knows that it's because there's something he wants to follow up with that, but unfortunately, whether or not Dave was planning on letting loose into a joke, he's not going to get the chance. There comes a point where Ryuji just can't take it any more, and with a tug backwards to their linked hands.

He goes right for it.]

[maybe there's something to be said about the embarrassing comic book metaphor they keep falling back on, that served as a catalyst that led them to where they're standing right now — because if there's one thing Superman's gotten really fucking good at, it's sweeping Lois Lane right off his feet.]

[and for a second he's trapped between surprise and finally reaching a collapse of the tension that had been building since the first time they tried to kiss, before the power rudely shut off both itself and the date they were having, and a mild internal flailing over what he's supposed to be doing with his hands, and should he try to move his shades out of the way? and.]

[and then those last two thoughts he was fretting over are pretty much flung to the wayside as instinct takes over instead. tension's replaced with an immense satisfaction over finally getting something he's been wanting for months, while they were both still working at their own sedate pace toward it. and even though instinct's guiding his hands right now, they don't really know what they're supposed to be doing either — but one hand does find its way up to Ryuji's head, fingers sliding through hair that may not even be bleached anymore, trying to somehow pull him closer, trying to show that Ryuji's decision to just go for it and kiss him was a move that was more than welcome.]

[who cares if his shades get smudged? Dave doesn't.]

[also, it should be pointed out that this makes Unreal Air a really bizarre version of mistletoe that's as unique to them as ever.]

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